Unbelievable News - AAI shuts down Ghanaian Adoptions

I remember opening up the email, and I couldn't believe my eyes. Jenn and I both received an email from AAI (Adoption Advocates International), our adoption agency in Washington, on Sept 21, but she hadn't read it yet. After I read the stunning news, I wasn't sure if I should show it to her because I knew how she would respond. not only that, but tonight was supposed to be her surprise birthday party that I'd been planning for a couple of weeks. But, I decided to show it to her nonetheless, and she broke down sobbing. Anita, our adoption coordinator at AAI announced not only that she was resigning from AAI, but she also announced that AAI was severing their partnership with their adoption agency in Ghana. In effect, if you hadn't received your referral yet (we haven't), there was no longer opportunity to adopt through AAI to Ghana. We were crushed. We were beyond crushed. Jenn said she felt like she'd had a miscarriage. This is what we had been praying for. This is what we had been saving our money for. This decision was a big step of faith, and we believed we were walking in obedience. My little boy is in Ghana. I called Anita and she said we could change countries, but Ghana was no longer an option. I told her all about our history with Ghana, and that Ghana was the only country where we wanted to adopt from. She said that if we wanted to stay with a Ghanian adoption, we would have to change agencies and that we would be out the money that we have already sent them ($12,000).

Jenn and I didn't know what to do. I was at first crushed and then I became very angry. This decision to adopt has affected our family. Jenn started making hand-stamped jewelry (Plus One Minus One Jewelry - see previous post or her Etsy shop to the right), and she's done very well, but it's taken a lot of her time. I've been painting houses to raise money (I've been the sole proprietor of "Helping Hand Painting since 1998) and it's taken many nights and weekends away from my family throughout 2012.

And then God spoke to us. Clearly. Calmly. It was a whisper of affirmation and encouragement. God spoke to me and said that if we adopted from Ghana, and we brought this little boy home to the States, that we would have a difficult, if not impossible, visa or immigration issue with him when we move to South Africa.

Doc Blessman saw our message that we posted that night, and he called us right away. We explained what had happened and he shared with us words of encouragement. After he shared, we realized that instead of being adoptive parents to a single boy, that if we moved to SA, we could be adoptive parents to "100's if not 1000's." This was like an epiphany. A revelation. It's certainly not what we originally wanted nor what we envisioned, but at this point, it appeared like the will of God.

We believe that adopting was a test of our faith. God was testing our faith. Would we believe Him? Would I be willing to give up my money that I value? Would I be willing to be obedient to James 1:27? Would I have faith in God? God was proving our faith. We believe this.

Although disappointed, we see God's hand moving again. Opening doors, shutting doors and confirming His will. Possibly we'll adopt from South Africa when we get there (the burden for orphans is as strong as ever).

We just simply want the will of God...and He has spoken.

(*On a side note, I still took Jenn out to eat that night, and surprised her when we came home to a house full of our closest friends and family who were able to encourage and strengthen us all night long. The Lord's timing is impeccable. The party alone was a confirmation that God's timing is...perfect.)

Blessman Ministries Incorporated - (BMI)

We finally got to meet Dr Jim and Beth Blessman today of Blessman Ministries Inc (see previous post back in May). We have had this day circled on our calendar for months. Doc is a retired physician from Iowa, and about 10 years ago, they started Blessman Ministries Inc (I'll refer to it as BMI from now on). Their base camp is just outside of Johannesburg, South Africa, and so we were very excited to meet them. We were praying that the Lord would confirm his will regarding the vision He gave me for Jo'burg back in Aug 28, 2010 (see previous post). To say the least, they were an absolute treat, and the Lord clearly gave Jennifer and I some confirmations. Earlier this week, Pastor Ron asked if I wanted to meet with them with the missions board before 1st service, which I absolutely agreed to. They were a very dear couple and you could tell their heart aligned exactly with our hearts. Doc had the chance to share during both services and we were treated to Biaggi's with Pastor Ron, Sandy, the Blessman's and one other couple that came with them from Iowa. We got home this evening and realized that God had opened up a door...a huge, life-changing door. Here are some of the bullet points that we love about BMI. I'll try to keep the list short.

• They feed 5000 needy children in Gauteng (Johannesburg) and across the country with distribution sites in Gauteng, Western Cape, Limpopo and soon Kwazulu Natal
• They have a heart for orphans, and they have a sponsor program similar to Compassion and World Vision. Jenn would be able to work with these orphans and help them succeed and have a chance.
• They live on a huge game park, so African wild life is abundant. My dream is to see a wild lion - but not too close...
• They have a small church in a local village. Doc asked if possibly I would help out in some fashion at the church. I've spent the last 3 years getting my ministerial credentials and I'm currently working on a Master's in Intercultural Studies at Moody Theological Seminary. They said we would have a vehicle available for travel when we get there
• In South Africa, it is highly recommended that all businesses and organizations give 1% of their earnings to charitable organizations. With my sales experience, Doc suggested that I could be a big asset to BMI in meeting with these businesses to try to obtain that 1%.
• Jim is a physician, and so I could have easy access to an MD while in SA. We also found out there's a CF Clinic right in Jo'burg. I'm currently investigating health insurance while in SA. I'm all set to continue having my current health insurance (Health Alliance) when we come back to the States
• BMI has a 2BR/2BA home on-site for us when we come. They invite teams throughout the year to come to SA and work with BMI for a 2 week stint, so I'm sure we'd be assisting with them
• They also bring in interns to advance their education (med students, vet students) and they are investing in the community by teaching farming and sewing, so education is a big component of their ministry, which is important for us too
• If we were to move to SA, one of the hardest parts would be leaving our friends and family back here in the States. The good thing is that we will be coming back yearly so we could still see our friends and family. It really is the best of both worlds. Although this is costly, we think this is positive for us not only physically, but also spiritually, emotionally, psychologically and mentally

www.blessmanministries.org

Dr Jim Blessman

A Day That Forever Changed Us

July 30, 2012. About 1:15. Tremont, IL

I'm obviously writing this after the fact, but I can't believe how much one single incident can change our family...for the rest of our lives.

I work for the University of Illinois Medical Center Reference Laboratory in Chicago. I sell lab testing to hospitals and clinics. I've been in the laboratory field for the past 11 years. I've been with UIC for the past 6.
I was over near Peoria, IL today on a business trip. It was a pretty typical day. I made several stops at clinics and hospitals in the morning and then stopped at a Hardee's for lunch. As I was walking out of the restaurant, I saw what appeared to be a homeless gal (probably 20 years old) sitting in a parking spot with all of her belongs in suitcases. She asked several people if she could have a ride to the court house. She looked up at me and asked the same question. I knew that I had passed the court house in Pekin earlier, so it was only about 2 miles, but a long walk for someone with 3 or 4 suitcases. The Spirit within me told me to give her a ride. I never (ever) give rides to females, but I regularly help those in need (someone whose car has broken down on the side of the interstate, or if someone asks for money. I've had many opportunities to help people in the last 6 year, but I've never given a female a ride in my car). For whatever reason, I knew that God had spoken, so I offered to give her a ride. She was very, very thankful.

I had her put ALL of her belongings in the trunk. If she had a knife or a gun in her purse, I wanted it in the trunk, not in the passenger seat.

I can't remember her name, but she was very nice and quite pretty. She also flirted with me, which although some guys would've taken an advantage of, I let her know that I was a minister and that put an end to that. She made a few phone calls to find out where her friend was at who was waiting for her near the court house and I dropped her off. We got all of the things out of my trunk and I handed her a tract (I pass out tracts whenever I help someone. I figure if I show love or help first, it will open up the pathway for the gospel). She put it in her purse and they drove off. I pray for her salvation.

As I was leaving Pekin, IL, I saw a sign for Tremont about 20 miles down the road on Route 9. This brought up many emotions as my close co-worker Gerry, who had a heart-attack and passed away back in June, was from Tremont. I thought it might be nice to stop in and see his wife and wish her my condolences. I hadn't had a chance to talk with her at the funeral. I missed my turn in Tremont and I realized I was heading out of town, so I stopped at the edge of town to turn around. I had my left turn signal on and was waiting for on-coming traffic to pass so that I could turn into the parking lot of a business and then go back into town. And then it happened.

I remember seeing a car way back there when I glanced in the rear-view mirror before turning. Apparently, when I slowed down and was stopped waiting to turn, he didn't see me. He was going 50 mph and never touched the brakes. Both cars were severely damaged and his was totaled. Jacob apologized profusely and I told him that everything would be fine.

Hannah rubbing my head in the ER

I remember right when he hit me, I screamed as my body slammed backwards into my seat and all of  my spare change in the change dish in my car flew all over the place. I skidded across on-coming traffic and finally stopped on the shoulder across the road. I never technically blacked out, but I knew that I was in shock. But that wasn't the most impressionable part of the accident. The most impressionable part was that God spoke to me. As clear as I've ever heard God speak to me before, He spoke again,

"Mark, you need to slow down."

Ironically enough, I was the one that was stopped, and "life" hit me full speed. But this wasn't what He meant.

God spoke to me, and we believe that he was trying to get our attention. I had worked 80 hours the week before, and I wasn't out of touch with God, but I was in the worry, hurry and busy-ness of life. He was getting my attention. And boy did he ever.

I was taken by ambulance with a c-spine on a gurney to OSF in Peoria. They did several X-rays and other than being really banged up, the only notable thing on the X-rays was a slip between the C2-C3 in my neck from the whiplash. I told them my shoulder really hurt and they told me to follow up with my primary care physician in the morning. Jenn and the kids came and picked me up. They were very scared, but relieved when they saw me. And that was the start of a very long, arduous trip back to full recovery. Little did I know that God was getting our attention...in a huge way.

R.I.P. Dad

My Dad passed away today. I'll miss him so much. I knew when I left the hospital today, that I wouldn't see him again. I told him goodbye. I cried and prayed over him. Not looking forward to his funeral this coming Saturday. Unfortunately, it'll be Father's Day weekend.

This photo was taken before I left the hospital today...he's always been the one to hold my hand...now I'm holding his. His hand held mine through the tough times. High-five'd me when I'd done something good. Carried me as a baby. Spanked me when I needed it. Held the American flag. Shot a gun in Vietnam. Gave me the thumbs up to communicate that I was his son. Took care of my mom. Held his grandkids. Worked tirelessly to provide for my mom and I.

Thank you for your love, service, support and sacrifice. I'll always be your son. Flesh and blood. You've helped shape who I am and for that I'll always love you.

Dad accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior last year. So, I know deep down, it's not "goodbye" but "see you later."

Now, go dance with Jesus.  

Update on my Dad

There are 2 people in my life that I'm the closest to (not counting Jesus or my kids). My wife and my dad. I have many other close family members (Cindy - my stepmom, uncles, cousins etc) and friends that have played significant roles in my life, but my wife and my dad are the two that have always been there. As many of you know, my biological mother and brother were killed in a car accident on Interstate 80 near Atlantica, Iowa, June 1980. I was in the vehicle with my dad right in front of them. I remember it like it happened yesterday. Through not only that trial, but many other circumstances, I've always looked up to my dad and respected him more than any other person on the planet. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last August and it's been a roller coaster since then to say the least.

He had a stroke on Sunday, May 13th, 2012, and would never be the same after that. Mother's Day.


That Sunday was a beautiful day and we were all in good spirits. We would be heading down state for an afternoon picnic with Jenn's family. I'd never make it. I had about 5 missed phone calls on my phone. It was my mom. I went straight to the ER.

It is interesting that his stroke was on May 13th. Yes, he had a 1/30 chance of having it on the 13th, but this number (13) is significant for Jenn and I. It pops up periodically in our marriage and it has from the time we started dating.

• We were married on Nov 13th, 2004 , and the pastor joked we'd have 13 kids
• The pastor who married us preached from 1 Cor 13
• My dad's voicemail at his work was #13
• When we went through IVF the first time, we parked in Lot 13
• When I woke up from the IVF procedure, I was in Bay 13
• This is stretching it, but our names (Mark Bettinger and Jenn Bettinger) has 13 letters in it and our last name starts with a "B" which is a "1" and a "3" put together. Stretching it, I know...
• My locker at Christie Clinic was #13

You get the point. But the #13 has always been a reminder that God is in what we are doing. So, when we were looking for a new house, we looked for addresses that had the number 13 in it. Finally we moved into 801 Chickory Drive. So much for that theory.

So, for my dad to have his stroke on May 13th, was a reminder that God is still in control and leading us. Dad was never the same after the stroke. But, we had really enjoyable times together and I was able to share everything on my heart with him. He always wanted a football team and a cheerleader (12 total kids). I always joked, "Well dad, at least you got your cheerleader."

A Chance Encounter...with God

I received an urgent call from Pastor Ron indicating that I was needed to sign some papers on the church mortgage re-fi at the bank. As the deacon council secretary, it was necessary for me to sign the paperwork along with the senior pastor. They needed to be signed that day, so I hurried back from the business trip that I was on, and arrived with only a few minutes to spare. The activity at the bank only took a few minutes and so Pastor Ron and I drove back together to the church. He invited me into his office and we sat and chatted for a few minutes. Pastor Ron asked me about Africa and the adoption process and how things were coming along. During our conversation I brought up the vision I had at the Men's retreat Aug 28, 2010 regarding Johannesburg, South Africa (see previous post) and with that he leaned back in his chair and smiled. He told me that just that day, he had penciled in some missionaries from Johannesburg, South Africa that he knew from his church back in Des Moines and that they were coming to speak on Sept 23rd at Meadowbrook. He gave me some literature on Dr Jim and Beth Blessman of Blessman Ministries Inc. I sensed immediately that there would be more to this story. I ended up emailing Doc Blessman that day and he returned my email on May 7th. Here's what he wrote:





Hi Mark,
Please let me know more about you vision for Johannesburg. We are busy opening a new distribution site in South Johannesburg. We have a big warehouse and donated space in that for food, shoes and we use the building to do optical outreaches.

Looking forward to seeing you soon.
Jim and Beth

www.blessmanministries.org

My heart leaped out of my chest. I sensed God opening up a door and confirming the vision for Jo'burg I had had a couple of years ago. I was really looking forward to meeting them later on in the fall. I forwarded the message to Jenn and we started praying...in earnest.

The Launch of Plus One Minus One

Plus One Minus One Jewelry

A couple of weeks before Mother's Day 2012, Jenn started making hand stamped aluminum necklaces and key chains. The name of her business is Plus One Minus One Jewelry. Simply put, it means "Plus One member to our family and Minus one orphan." She can design anything that you'd like or you can choose from designs that she's already made.

Check out her Etsy page to see all of her designs and prices:
Plus One Minus One Etsy Shop - www.plusoneminusone.etsy.com


If you're on Facebook, check out her page there as well -
www.facebook.com/PlusOneMinusOneJewelry

She also sells in 2 retail shops called "Frogs and Fairies" in Urbana, IL and Bloomington, IL

Frogs and Fairies Boutique Website

All proceeds from the jewelry goes towards serving orphans and ministries in Africa. It will also help to bring our little guy home from Ghana.

Thank you to those of you who have purchased jewelry already!