A Day That Forever Changed Us

July 30, 2012. About 1:15. Tremont, IL

I'm obviously writing this after the fact, but I can't believe how much one single incident can change our family...for the rest of our lives.

I work for the University of Illinois Medical Center Reference Laboratory in Chicago. I sell lab testing to hospitals and clinics. I've been in the laboratory field for the past 11 years. I've been with UIC for the past 6.
I was over near Peoria, IL today on a business trip. It was a pretty typical day. I made several stops at clinics and hospitals in the morning and then stopped at a Hardee's for lunch. As I was walking out of the restaurant, I saw what appeared to be a homeless gal (probably 20 years old) sitting in a parking spot with all of her belongs in suitcases. She asked several people if she could have a ride to the court house. She looked up at me and asked the same question. I knew that I had passed the court house in Pekin earlier, so it was only about 2 miles, but a long walk for someone with 3 or 4 suitcases. The Spirit within me told me to give her a ride. I never (ever) give rides to females, but I regularly help those in need (someone whose car has broken down on the side of the interstate, or if someone asks for money. I've had many opportunities to help people in the last 6 year, but I've never given a female a ride in my car). For whatever reason, I knew that God had spoken, so I offered to give her a ride. She was very, very thankful.

I had her put ALL of her belongings in the trunk. If she had a knife or a gun in her purse, I wanted it in the trunk, not in the passenger seat.

I can't remember her name, but she was very nice and quite pretty. She also flirted with me, which although some guys would've taken an advantage of, I let her know that I was a minister and that put an end to that. She made a few phone calls to find out where her friend was at who was waiting for her near the court house and I dropped her off. We got all of the things out of my trunk and I handed her a tract (I pass out tracts whenever I help someone. I figure if I show love or help first, it will open up the pathway for the gospel). She put it in her purse and they drove off. I pray for her salvation.

As I was leaving Pekin, IL, I saw a sign for Tremont about 20 miles down the road on Route 9. This brought up many emotions as my close co-worker Gerry, who had a heart-attack and passed away back in June, was from Tremont. I thought it might be nice to stop in and see his wife and wish her my condolences. I hadn't had a chance to talk with her at the funeral. I missed my turn in Tremont and I realized I was heading out of town, so I stopped at the edge of town to turn around. I had my left turn signal on and was waiting for on-coming traffic to pass so that I could turn into the parking lot of a business and then go back into town. And then it happened.

I remember seeing a car way back there when I glanced in the rear-view mirror before turning. Apparently, when I slowed down and was stopped waiting to turn, he didn't see me. He was going 50 mph and never touched the brakes. Both cars were severely damaged and his was totaled. Jacob apologized profusely and I told him that everything would be fine.

Hannah rubbing my head in the ER

I remember right when he hit me, I screamed as my body slammed backwards into my seat and all of  my spare change in the change dish in my car flew all over the place. I skidded across on-coming traffic and finally stopped on the shoulder across the road. I never technically blacked out, but I knew that I was in shock. But that wasn't the most impressionable part of the accident. The most impressionable part was that God spoke to me. As clear as I've ever heard God speak to me before, He spoke again,

"Mark, you need to slow down."

Ironically enough, I was the one that was stopped, and "life" hit me full speed. But this wasn't what He meant.

God spoke to me, and we believe that he was trying to get our attention. I had worked 80 hours the week before, and I wasn't out of touch with God, but I was in the worry, hurry and busy-ness of life. He was getting my attention. And boy did he ever.

I was taken by ambulance with a c-spine on a gurney to OSF in Peoria. They did several X-rays and other than being really banged up, the only notable thing on the X-rays was a slip between the C2-C3 in my neck from the whiplash. I told them my shoulder really hurt and they told me to follow up with my primary care physician in the morning. Jenn and the kids came and picked me up. They were very scared, but relieved when they saw me. And that was the start of a very long, arduous trip back to full recovery. Little did I know that God was getting our attention...in a huge way.

R.I.P. Dad

My Dad passed away today. I'll miss him so much. I knew when I left the hospital today, that I wouldn't see him again. I told him goodbye. I cried and prayed over him. Not looking forward to his funeral this coming Saturday. Unfortunately, it'll be Father's Day weekend.

This photo was taken before I left the hospital today...he's always been the one to hold my hand...now I'm holding his. His hand held mine through the tough times. High-five'd me when I'd done something good. Carried me as a baby. Spanked me when I needed it. Held the American flag. Shot a gun in Vietnam. Gave me the thumbs up to communicate that I was his son. Took care of my mom. Held his grandkids. Worked tirelessly to provide for my mom and I.

Thank you for your love, service, support and sacrifice. I'll always be your son. Flesh and blood. You've helped shape who I am and for that I'll always love you.

Dad accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior last year. So, I know deep down, it's not "goodbye" but "see you later."

Now, go dance with Jesus.  

Update on my Dad

There are 2 people in my life that I'm the closest to (not counting Jesus or my kids). My wife and my dad. I have many other close family members (Cindy - my stepmom, uncles, cousins etc) and friends that have played significant roles in my life, but my wife and my dad are the two that have always been there. As many of you know, my biological mother and brother were killed in a car accident on Interstate 80 near Atlantica, Iowa, June 1980. I was in the vehicle with my dad right in front of them. I remember it like it happened yesterday. Through not only that trial, but many other circumstances, I've always looked up to my dad and respected him more than any other person on the planet. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last August and it's been a roller coaster since then to say the least.

He had a stroke on Sunday, May 13th, 2012, and would never be the same after that. Mother's Day.


That Sunday was a beautiful day and we were all in good spirits. We would be heading down state for an afternoon picnic with Jenn's family. I'd never make it. I had about 5 missed phone calls on my phone. It was my mom. I went straight to the ER.

It is interesting that his stroke was on May 13th. Yes, he had a 1/30 chance of having it on the 13th, but this number (13) is significant for Jenn and I. It pops up periodically in our marriage and it has from the time we started dating.

• We were married on Nov 13th, 2004 , and the pastor joked we'd have 13 kids
• The pastor who married us preached from 1 Cor 13
• My dad's voicemail at his work was #13
• When we went through IVF the first time, we parked in Lot 13
• When I woke up from the IVF procedure, I was in Bay 13
• This is stretching it, but our names (Mark Bettinger and Jenn Bettinger) has 13 letters in it and our last name starts with a "B" which is a "1" and a "3" put together. Stretching it, I know...
• My locker at Christie Clinic was #13

You get the point. But the #13 has always been a reminder that God is in what we are doing. So, when we were looking for a new house, we looked for addresses that had the number 13 in it. Finally we moved into 801 Chickory Drive. So much for that theory.

So, for my dad to have his stroke on May 13th, was a reminder that God is still in control and leading us. Dad was never the same after the stroke. But, we had really enjoyable times together and I was able to share everything on my heart with him. He always wanted a football team and a cheerleader (12 total kids). I always joked, "Well dad, at least you got your cheerleader."

A Chance Encounter...with God

I received an urgent call from Pastor Ron indicating that I was needed to sign some papers on the church mortgage re-fi at the bank. As the deacon council secretary, it was necessary for me to sign the paperwork along with the senior pastor. They needed to be signed that day, so I hurried back from the business trip that I was on, and arrived with only a few minutes to spare. The activity at the bank only took a few minutes and so Pastor Ron and I drove back together to the church. He invited me into his office and we sat and chatted for a few minutes. Pastor Ron asked me about Africa and the adoption process and how things were coming along. During our conversation I brought up the vision I had at the Men's retreat Aug 28, 2010 regarding Johannesburg, South Africa (see previous post) and with that he leaned back in his chair and smiled. He told me that just that day, he had penciled in some missionaries from Johannesburg, South Africa that he knew from his church back in Des Moines and that they were coming to speak on Sept 23rd at Meadowbrook. He gave me some literature on Dr Jim and Beth Blessman of Blessman Ministries Inc. I sensed immediately that there would be more to this story. I ended up emailing Doc Blessman that day and he returned my email on May 7th. Here's what he wrote:





Hi Mark,
Please let me know more about you vision for Johannesburg. We are busy opening a new distribution site in South Johannesburg. We have a big warehouse and donated space in that for food, shoes and we use the building to do optical outreaches.

Looking forward to seeing you soon.
Jim and Beth

www.blessmanministries.org

My heart leaped out of my chest. I sensed God opening up a door and confirming the vision for Jo'burg I had had a couple of years ago. I was really looking forward to meeting them later on in the fall. I forwarded the message to Jenn and we started praying...in earnest.

The Launch of Plus One Minus One

Plus One Minus One Jewelry

A couple of weeks before Mother's Day 2012, Jenn started making hand stamped aluminum necklaces and key chains. The name of her business is Plus One Minus One Jewelry. Simply put, it means "Plus One member to our family and Minus one orphan." She can design anything that you'd like or you can choose from designs that she's already made.

Check out her Etsy page to see all of her designs and prices:
Plus One Minus One Etsy Shop - www.plusoneminusone.etsy.com


If you're on Facebook, check out her page there as well -
www.facebook.com/PlusOneMinusOneJewelry

She also sells in 2 retail shops called "Frogs and Fairies" in Urbana, IL and Bloomington, IL

Frogs and Fairies Boutique Website

All proceeds from the jewelry goes towards serving orphans and ministries in Africa. It will also help to bring our little guy home from Ghana.

Thank you to those of you who have purchased jewelry already! 

Applying to Grad School

I've recently finished up my Ministerial Credentialing through Global University. It took me two long years, but the hard work and effort was well worth it. I learned so much and gained a greater appreciate for His Word. I still can remember when I called and chatted with Dr Keith Hendrie (see post on Oct 17, 2010) in late 2010, and he advised me that if I wanted to go into ministry, he would recommend some formal training. I just didn't think I would ever go to Grad school. I went with the MC first, thinking I might some day get Licensed, but little did I know God had other plans. Going to Global was an easy decision. It worked well with my schedule since it was all on-line and you could pretty much go at your own pace, so it was certainly a good fit. By the time I finished up the MC, I was wanting to continue my education. I did a search on becoming Licensed (step 2 to Ordination) thru Global, but as I searched for ministry positions in NGOs and organizations like Compassion Int'l and World Vision, I repeatedly read that they were looking for candidates with a Master's degree (or at least a Bachelor's degree from a seminary, neither of which I had). So, we started praying about it, and through some unique circumstances, the Lord led me to Moody Theological Seminary in Chicago.

I applied to Moody, which was a very lengthy process and was finally accepted! I also found out that many consider Moody the "gold standard" of Seminaries. I would also put Gordon-Conwell, Dallas Theological and Fuller Theological Seminaries in that list. I went up to Moody for a tour on Feb 28th, 2012 and Josi (my tour guide) announced that "Congratulations, I just spoke with Admissions and you were accepted!" I initially chose a M.A. in Ministry Leadership but changed to a M.A. in Intercultural Studies. I really believe that this decision would enable me to be a better minister to the continent of Africa and here in the States. Reaching out to the lost in other cultures (Unreached People Groups all 7,000+ global UPG's) is certainly first and foremost in my heart. I decided to go the "Modular" route, where I would have 7 weeks of pre-course work, go to Moody for a full week (per class) and then have 7 weeks of post-course work. I also decided to take some on-line classes as well. I was very excited to be a student again. It will be a long, difficult 4 years, but well worth the effort.

My first class at Moody with Dr Tucker

I absolutely love taking classes! I'm one of those nerdy folks that loves to read, loves to write and loves to study. I love to learn. I love to grow. If you've ever considered going to Seminary, (I'm a salesman at heart, sorry) feel free to check out Moody:

Moody Theological Seminary Website

Picking an Agency

I have been doing some research in my email account trying to nail down dates and the timeline of events. I did a search for AAI (Adoption Advocates International) which is the adoption agency in the state of Washington that we ended up going with, and I found a startling fact. Here's the first email with "AAI" in the subject or body of the email that's in my inbox:

http://www.adoptionadvocates.org/Africa/index.php

this is the agency that Janel recommended.. I've sent an email to Janel and to the agency requesting an info packet. I'll let you know what I find out...

LOVE you. (secretly a little excited too)
Jenn



What struck me so significantly was the fact that Jenn sent me this message on

Mon, Jun 13, 2011 07:42 PM 

I couldn't believe it! I do not remember Jenn sending me this message nor do I remember that she had been excited about adopting from Africa before we even went to Ghana. I knew that it had been on her heart for quite sometime, but didn't realize that it went back over a year ago.

After we both believed the Lord was leading us to adopt, we contacted AAI again and they sent us some information and we formally signed an agreement with them to adopt a little boy age 2-5 from Ghana. I received my first correspondence with the director of the program on Feb 20, 2012. Anita Gillispie is awesome. She has adopted from Ghana a couple of times herself and has been there numerous times. She has a heart for the country and for the people. She's been a great resource. We feel like God has confirmed several things for us and that we are moving in a positive direction.

I CAN'T WAIT to meet my little guy! Sam and him will be buddies, I'm sure. 4 kids...one for each hand for Jenn and I, and we can all hold them at the same time. But that's it for me, 4 and no more! (Famous last words, I'm sure).
We announced to the kids that we were adopting a little boy from Africa when we were walking out of church. I asked Mady what should we call him so that we can pray for him by name? (as opposed to just praying for "the little orphan boy in Africa that we are adopting" each time) She looked at me and said that we should pray for him as "Little Orphan Steve." Apparently, she has this thing for the youth pastor at our church, Pastor Steve. So, from then on, we've prayed for him and referred to him as "Little Orphan Steve." When we adopt, we are actually going to change or add to his middle name "Stephen."

We really believe that we will make an eternal impact on a soul. What is that worth?

Priceless.