I remember opening up the email, and I couldn't believe my eyes. Jenn and I both received an email from AAI (Adoption Advocates International), our adoption agency in Washington, on Sept 21, but she hadn't read it yet. After I read the stunning news, I wasn't sure if I should show it to her because I knew how she would respond. not only that, but tonight was supposed to be her surprise birthday party that I'd been planning for a couple of weeks. But, I decided to show it to her nonetheless, and she broke down sobbing. Anita, our adoption coordinator at AAI announced not only that she was resigning from AAI, but she also announced that AAI was severing their partnership with their adoption agency in Ghana. In effect, if you hadn't received your referral yet (we haven't), there was no longer opportunity to adopt through AAI to Ghana. We were crushed. We were beyond crushed. Jenn said she felt like she'd had a miscarriage. This is what we had been praying for. This is what we had been saving our money for. This decision was a big step of faith, and we believed we were walking in obedience. My little boy is in Ghana. I called Anita and she said we could change countries, but Ghana was no longer an option. I told her all about our history with Ghana, and that Ghana was the only country where we wanted to adopt from. She said that if we wanted to stay with a Ghanian adoption, we would have to change agencies and that we would be out the money that we have already sent them ($12,000).
Jenn and I didn't know what to do. I was at first crushed and then I became very angry. This decision to adopt has affected our family. Jenn started making hand-stamped jewelry (Plus One Minus One Jewelry - see previous post or her Etsy shop to the right), and she's done very well, but it's taken a lot of her time. I've been painting houses to raise money (I've been the sole proprietor of "Helping Hand Painting since 1998) and it's taken many nights and weekends away from my family throughout 2012.
And then God spoke to us. Clearly. Calmly. It was a whisper of affirmation and encouragement. God spoke to me and said that if we adopted from Ghana, and we brought this little boy home to the States, that we would have a difficult, if not impossible, visa or immigration issue with him when we move to South Africa.
Doc Blessman saw our message that we posted that night, and he called us right away. We explained what had happened and he shared with us words of encouragement. After he shared, we realized that instead of being adoptive parents to a single boy, that if we moved to SA, we could be adoptive parents to "100's if not 1000's." This was like an epiphany. A revelation. It's certainly not what we originally wanted nor what we envisioned, but at this point, it appeared like the will of God.
We believe that adopting was a test of our faith. God was testing our faith. Would we believe Him? Would I be willing to give up my money that I value? Would I be willing to be obedient to James 1:27? Would I have faith in God? God was proving our faith. We believe this.
Although disappointed, we see God's hand moving again. Opening doors, shutting doors and confirming His will. Possibly we'll adopt from South Africa when we get there (the burden for orphans is as strong as ever).
We just simply want the will of God...and He has spoken.
(*On a side note, I still took Jenn out to eat that night, and surprised her when we came home to a house full of our closest friends and family who were able to encourage and strengthen us all night long. The Lord's timing is impeccable. The party alone was a confirmation that God's timing is...perfect.)
