The Non-Accidental Accident

July 30th, 2012. 2 years ago today. A day that will forever change my life.

Have you ever had a life changing event? Something happens to you and as you look back you realize that the impact of that time is still reverberating throughout your life today? Maybe someone passed away or you got a new job or you lost a job or you inherited a sum of money from a rich uncle. Maybe it was the day you got horrible news at the doctor's office or you made a life altering decision to give up a vice in life. I had one of those days. I was in a horrible car accident, but it wasn't accidental. Allow me to explain.

For 7 years I was an account manager and sales executive for a national reference laboratory which required extensive traveling. It was a good job with excellent benefits. We were living the American dream with a mortgage, an SUV and 3 kids. We were serving the Lord, directing a thriving college ministry and being a witness as he led us. And then it happened. The non-accidental accident.

I was on a business trip near Peoria and I was rear-ended. I had stopped on Route 9 waiting to turn left across oncoming traffic and a 20 year old kid who was distracted (!) rear-ended me going about 55 mph. He slammed me across oncoming traffic (praise God I wasn't in a head on collision as well) and down into the ditch on the other side of the road. As I shook off the confusion and exited my vehicle, I ran over and helped him push his totaled vehicle out of the road so that it wouldn't be hit by oncoming traffic. I was running on pure adrenaline at this point and then it hit me. The pain. My neck and left shoulder started to throb and so I just sorta laid down where I was and the ambulance came and put me on a stretcher and I was brought to the hospital. Jenn and the kids came about 2 hours later.

Hannah patting my head.

My left shoulder was 60% torn, requiring an extensive bankart tear repair surgery, a week in the hospital and 9 months of rehab at home and with a physical therapist. My lower back was also injured and I was in physical therapy for about 9 months for that as well. Both of them still bother me frequently. The surgeon told me that I'll 100% have to have a shoulder replacement within the next 20 years. The PA who assisted the surgeon told me afterwards that it was the worst bankart tear he'd seen in 4 years.

Hours of PT at my house using this pulley

But you know what? I'm glad I was in that accident. You see, I wouldn't be where 

I am now without it. We normally don't see the beginning from the end. We try to figure out the will of God, but as a whole, we're not very good at ascertaining it. We aren't called to understand God's will but we are called to believe him for it - to live a life of faith, trusting him with every move we make.

You see, without that accident, I wouldn't have had:
1. Nine months to quietly listen to God every day as he was ordering my steps
2. Met many people during my rehab who I prayed for
3. Sold my house and moved out of my comfort zone
4. Moved in with my mom and really re-reconnect with her (my dad passed away about a month before my accident)
5. Courageously raised financial support and moved 9000 miles to South Africa with Jenn and the kids
6. Spent an awesome 2013-2014 in Africa ministering to countless people who we still love and keep in contact with now
7. Moved back to the States and then moved 800 miles after 3 months to go into full time college ministry at the University of Louisiana.

You can ask questions of God but don't question him. Big difference. Don't for one second think that he has forgotten about you. Don't believe the lie of the enemy that you are alone. He has promised (I'll repeat myself - He has PROMISED) and he has given us HIS WORD and he doesn't lie, to NEVER leave you NOR forsake you. He is always there even if you don't see him with your natural eyes. We can sense him with our spiritual hearts through the power of the Holy Spirit. Did I appreciate all of the pain and suffering my wife and I and the kids endured after the accident? No. Did I choose to have the accident? No. Did I love getting addicted to pain killers and then having to go through counseling to step off of them? (the hardest part of the whole ordeal) No. Has it taught me a 1000 different things and taken me to places I would have never dreamed of? Absolutely. It wasn't an accident. It was a non-accidental accident. God allowed it to happen. I don't understand the will of God but I believe him. I trust him. And I love him. Our lives are in his hands and since he made me and formed me, I suppose he can do with me whatever he chooses.

I'll never be the same and for that, I'm thankful for July 30, 2012 on July 30, 2014.

May you be blessed.

11 steps to financial security (on a missionary budget) #7 might surprise you.

My wife and I are missionaries. It goes without saying that we've learned to cut corners. Choosing a faith-based career and not knowing what you will bring in on any given month (we are donor supported) can have its pluses and minuses. On the plus side - your faith grows steadily. On the negative side, there's always a chance you won't be able to pay your rent. I'll focus on the positive here for a few moments. Having worked in the secular field for 12 years as a sales executive in the medical field afforded me a lot of opportunities and taught me a lot of financial lessons. Here is my top 11 list to finding financial security - even on a missionary budget.

1. Get out of debt and stay out of debt. This may be a shocker, but debt is dumb (thank you Dave Ramsey). Having had no debt since last year (after we sold our house) has been so liberating. We spent years making payments on a house and vehicles. Never again.

2. Be sensible with your vehicle purchases. When we moved back from Africa, I needed to buy a second vehicle to get to work. Research, research, research. I searched for almost a month for a Jeep on craigslist, ebay and my favorite site: cargurus.com. Don't just walk into your local dealer and expect a "deal." The local dealers were $5k-$10k higher than online. Be willing to go out of state. I know there's a lot of lemons out there, but if you search and research, you can get a good deal. Don't be afraid to walk away. Ask me about the time we drove to Indiana 3 hours away, test drove a vehicle and drove home empty handed...

3. Can we spell "delayed gratification" or even "no?" How many times have we heard "I need to get it, and I need to get it now." New iPhone (mine broke - need a new one!), new TV, dining room set, addition on the home. Save your money. Don't even breathe the same air as one of those "rent-to-own" rip offs. Save your money. Buy something with cash. It's fun to write a CHECK for a big purchase.

4. Write out a budget. Actually sit down and think about everything you spend money on. Get a pen and a spreadsheet (Excel works too or some software - just use what you will actually use). Get some envelopes. Put cash in the envelopes. If there's $50 in the "eating out" envelope, how much money do you get to spend this month on "eating out?" Don't you dare say $100 - I'll borrow from next month's eating out envelope. You get $50! Ruth's Chris Steak House is not in your future. Steak-n-Shake is. Educate yourself on tax write-offs. You will thank yourself profusely on April 15th. Trust me on this one.

5. Invest in your future. You get $25 you spend $25. This leads to financial death. I had a truck payment of $340 a month (never again). If I took that $340 and invested it wisely for the life of the loan (5 years) at a modest 5% interest rate, in 5 years, I would have had almost $25,000. You can take that to the bank. If you travel a lot, don't buy a vehicle that's more than $10k. You'll destroy it and any money over that. You don't need to buy a $20,000 and after 2 years it's worth $10k. You just lost $10,000. Hope you enjoy the car.

6. Invest wisely in your future. Don't invest in a vehicle. They depreciate. Invest in things that appreciate. Invest with a good quality, trusted investor. Invest in your home. We bought a house in Champaign with an unfinished basement (on purpose). I spent 6 weeks in the evenings and weekends finishing the basement. It cost me quite a bit in materials and extra help (electrician, dry walling, carpet and plumber) but when we sold our house we got over double the cost of the renovation back. Learn a trade. I made $5k-$10k a year painting homes for friends and family a few weekends a month. Jenn started a jewelry business (hand-stamped jewelry). A few years back she made $4000 in November and December. Christmas was pretty cool that year.

7. Recognize that God is your provider. I've given you pretty sound advice but we have learned time and time again that God really is our provider. He takes care of us and we don't worry about things. (Having no debt and no payments certainly helps). We walk by faith and fully submit and surrender to him for our needs. We have never been in lack.

8. Marry a thrifty spouse. My wife rocks. Her favorite store? Goodwill. Her favorite website? Craigslist. Favorite time of year? Garage sales. We love buying used. But we are snobby when it comes to buying used stuff. We don't buy stuff just because it's a good deal. We buy quality used. Clothes, toys, furniture, anything really. Oh and if you find a great deal, buy it and then re-sell it on craigslist and score big. Done it many times. It's actually a game and has become sport for us.

9. Be a giver. We have always tithed 10% of our (gross) income. We have always supported other missionaries. We have always given offerings for special projects that come along. We love surprising people at Christmas time (rather than over indulging each other or our kids). We love paying for their meals when we go with our friends. We love doing projects and rejecting any payment. We thoroughly enjoyed  blessing many when we were in Africa. No one will ever know who or what it was. We love to give. It's also become sport for us. Who can we surprise? Who can we be a huge blessing to? Let's watch their face when they open (x) and they have no idea who gave them (x). Givers are never in need. We DO NOT preach a prosperity gospel but I have found a principle to be true: those that give just seem to be in a more stable place. God's economy doesn't make sense. 90% with him is worth more than 100% in my hands.

10. Cut coupons and look for steals. We will even go to a new bookstore, and find a book we like and then scan it on our phones and buy it used on amazon while in the store (free shipping with Amazon Prime). 2 days later, bam! we have our book. We will scour the internet looking for the best deal. My daughter wanted a certain lego set when she made about $100 at a lemonade stand (in 4 hours!) this Spring. Location, location, location (college campuses are the bomb!) The lego set went discontinued and went up over $100, even on line. We won the bid on an ebay auction for $60. Taught Mady a good lesson on delayed gratification and research and she saved $40.

11. Meet new people and read! You will only be in a different place in 5 years if you meet new people or read about something new. Take classes. Take online classes. Several years ago, the Lord led me to go back and take Bible classes at a seminary and get credentialed. I did this while working 50 hours a week, 3 kids, health challenges and running a college ministry. I also worked my tail off to get grants and scholarships ($2B annually goes unpaid) to get a full ride. Don't give me any excuses. Little did I know how much that would play into my new career now. I followed my dream and the pathway opened up. I sure didn't sit at home and complain. Go learn a new trade or skill. You only have 1 life to live - go for it!

I don't care what the Jones' next door bought. I don't put a lot of value on material stuff. I do care about what can I do to minister to people better. That may mean a new living situation or a new (new to me but still used) vehicle. I don't care who is putting an addition on their house (but I'll enjoy it when they do!) I don't care what fancy vehicle a friend buys or the newest fashion fads (that's obvious - ask my wife). I invest in what matters. People. I invest in what appreciates - mutual funds and property. Start somewhere. Don't wait until you can put a $1000/month into an investment. Start with $25 a month now. Start somewhere!

Have a goal. Want to get out of debt (not counting your mortgage) in 24 months? Make it a goal. Have the eye of a tiger. Get crazy with it. If we were in debt, we would have been disqualified from going to Africa as full time missionaries or to the University of Louisiana as campus ministers. What have you been disqualified from doing? God wants to use your resources in awesome ways. Seek him for everything and just see what joy it will bring. May you be blessed!